Saturday, September 9, 2006

Blog ko, Drama, Atbp....

Blogs ko, drama, atbp....

Out of Kilter

http://www.picturetrail.com/philamgirl

(Please click above link for Photos).

Something bothers me lately...

Crab and/or Crawfish mentality, that is!


Unfortunately this isn't the first time I heard some people say that this vile characteristic is one great sickness of Filipinos. What's even more sad though, is when a Filipino says it about his own people. That is something I can't quite comprehend. As if it isn't bad enough we are getting blackballed by others, here we have to deal with our own....

Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't we supposed to love one another; isn't that one of God's most fervent noble wishes (commandments)? Then why act as oppose to it? It's really disappointing to many of us because we see the total opposite of this a lot more these days. For instance, when our kababayans (Fellow Filipinos) tell on those poor TNTS... what's the deal? I don't know any TNTS myself, kung may makilala man ako, aasikasuhin ko 'yong sarili kong business. But then again, we really don't know what prompted or what's driving some (there may be a number of reasons that lead them to do such a thing -- maybe they think they are just being law abiding citizens and doing the society a favor. Buti and I can see if the TNTS ay mga terorista. Iba na 'yon, dapat magkaisa para sugpuin talaga 'yon) to do it, so I really can't judge them. Like I said, some Filipinos don't have the sense of camaraderie, but I still wouldn't stigmatize them in general as "envious people;" and it is unreasonable to say, because of that alone, that Filipinos have this type of dire mentality; it simply isn't true.

That leads me to these questions, "how do they know for sure that all or the majority of Filipinos are this way? Where did they draw their general conclusion from?" I'd like to know. Do they just focus on us alone, watching our every move or the words we say, and hence came to a conclusion that this is who and how we really are as Filipinos in whole? Wow, they make it sound as if we're the worst race of people that ever walked on earth.

The thing is, most people tend to stereotype, that's true in every race. But just because you heard something from one person about someone doesn't make it all true--it's wrong to make a whole race suffer or pay the price of one particular individual's mistakes or misdeeds. When we judge a man, we alter that person's life, with unpredictable effect...and subsequently, will have to live with that.

The truth is, crab or crawfish mentality did not originate from the Philippines. This is not what we represent; or at least not just the Filipinos. It's a universal dilemma since men begun to roam this planet and since the time we were given the capacitiy to feel emotions. So let's stop unpleasantly branding one another, instead, be aware of others' feelings and think of the consequence that can affect each and everyone of us in some ways big and small if we continue to discriminate or ostracize.

Rejoice the success of others, specially of those family/relatives and/or friends.
Fill your heart with joy, you'll live longer! That's one less you'll worry about.

--PleasurezAndPainz

A Wise man once said that "envy is the most anti-social and evil of all passions."
I recommend this website for a related subject:
http://word.crusade.org/word/word496.html

Posted By: Heart Speaks Online

Sept 05


'Yan na nga ba sinasabi ko eh, kaya pala I was feeling so down, magkakasakit pala ako, eto ako ngayon, may trangkaso, walang ginawa ngayon kundi matulog. Ala din naman akong ganang kumain, kahit pa ano ulam. Ewan ko, ala akong panlasa eh, gano'n ako pag may lagnat o trangkaso minsan e. Kaasar.

Pero it doesn't help any din 'yong mag-isip ng kung ano-ano, like kahapon talaga, para akong hilong talilok, matapos mabasa ng ulan pagkagaling namin sa mall. So pinakain ako, kase baka daw sa gutom, I ate, pero gano'n pa din, talagang naduduling ako sa hilo, saka nadodouble tingin ko. So inihiga ko, kahit para akong mag b-blow. Hay. Eto, medyo maigi ng konti ngayon ang aking pakiramdam, kase uminom ako ng gamot, kani-kanina. And I feel so bored, kaya eto, sa harap ng pc, nag tatata-type na naman. Hehe.

Anyway, a few days ago, iyong isang kakilala ko, nagkuk'wento tungkol sa kanyang lovelife. Down din s'ya, so sabi ko, buti nga ikaw may lovelife eh, 'yong iba wala. Pero sad daw s'ya eh. Kase sabi n'ya, 'yong guy daw na mahal n'ya, masyado daw reserve...as in hindi daw open sa kanya. 'Yong feelings daw ba, parang patago? Hindi daw tuloy n'ya talaga alam kung ano tunay na nararamdaman no'n. "Ha ha ha," sabi ko, "Welcome to the club, ang sa akin man ay mahirap maunawain, hindi na kase s'ya katulad ng dati, noon na nasasabi n'ya ang lahat sa akin, ngayon ata ay nac-cornihan na s'ya, kaya nga matagal ko na ding hindi nadidinig 'yong gusto kong madinig. 'Yon, corny daw e...ata, so OK lang." Sabi n'ya, "Gano'n ba? Hindi pala ako nag-iisa. Bakit gan'yan ang mga lalaki, feeling nila cool sila pag 'yon hindi sila nas-share sa atin ng kahit na anong intimate thoughts, kahit na nakakasakit sa atin 'yon, dahil we long to hear 'yon eh...something that will definitely makes us happy to hear, kahit paminsan-minsan. Pero para silang walang pakiramdam, pinapalungkot tayo. Cool ba 'yon? It's actually uncool...." Sa sinabi n'ya, naaalala ko tuloy 'yong librong Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, so sabi ko na lang, "I don't know, your guess is just as good as mine, di ko rin maintindihan eh... I just thought once they realized mahal nila 'yong tao, they shouldn't hide it; they shouldn't be afraid na aminin o sabihin 'yon sa ating mga babae, after all, it's natural; Love is not something to be ashamed of." Sabi nga ni W. Shakespeare "To Thine Own Self Be True, diba?" Naks.

Truth be told: Simula ng huli ko s'yang makausap, di na ako mapalagay. Parang na-heightened 'yong alarm eh, na knowing na in the line of work, madami s'yang nakakasalamuhang ibang mga babae, na sigurado (ayaw n'ya lang sabihin sa akin dahil baka magselos ako), magaganda sila at mga bata pa....and sooner or later, makakalimutan na n'ya ako, ipagpapalit sa iba. Honestly, I can't bear the thought, kaya tuloy low ako, in spirits ngayon. Pero sige, OK lang. Whatever makes him happy, ayos na rin sa akin 'yon, di ko magagawang magalit sa kanya, after all, ako din naman may kasalanan talaga eh, kaya ayoko nga ding mangulit, hindi dapat, and if anything, 'yon ang nakakahiya. So lie-low muna ako. So, gano'n na lang muna 'yon.

Mga lyrics ng songs na gusto kong napapakinggan lately, nilalagay ko ngayon dito. Ewan, trip lang....Laterz!
Jealous
By Nina

Jealous of the girl who caught your eye
One of my darker days
When you looked at her where was I?
Shoulda been in her place
Here I am
All alone imagining what could have been
If I had been there

[Chorus:]
Jealous of the one whose arms are around you
If she's keeping you satisfied
Jealous of the one who finally found you
Made your sun and your stars collide
La la la la la la la
She's a very very lucky girl
La la la la la la la

Jealous of the one who won your heart
They say it's a perfect match
She's gonna get to be where you are
And I don't get better than that
She'll say you're fine
Whisper words I wish were mine
And they might have been
If I had been there

[Repeat Chorus]

You know I'd fight the good fight
If I thought I'd change your mind
But if she makes you happy
I would leave that dream behind
Man, she better treat you right
And give you everything
Cause at the moment she doesn't
I'll be waiting in the wings

[Repeat Chorus]

La la la la la la la
She's a very very lucky girl

@@@@@

Just Tell me You Love me
By: England Dan And John Ford Coley

Many times, I wished you were here,
Through the velvet shadows of my dreams
Many times, I wished you were near,
Through the darkness as it came but it seems
That you, you never said what I needed to hear
Just tell me you love me,
Whisper words I so long to hear
Let this time not be borrowed
Let it be ours to share,
If you tell me you love me
It would lead a way to your heart
Through the mirrors of silence, you love me
Quietly, I've waited,
For the memory born of our first kiss
Patiently, I've waited,
For the moment you would take me to world
That I, I've never seen that world before
Just tell me you love me
Whisper words I so long to hear
Let this time not be borrowed
Let it be ours to share
If you tell me you love me
It would lead a way to your heart
Through the mirrors of silence, you love me, you love me



@@@@@

Ang Huling El Bimbo
By: Eraseheads


Kamukha mo si Paraluman
nung tayo ay bata pa
at ang galing-galing mo sumayaw
mapabugi man o cha cha
ngunit ang pabotrito
ay pagsayaw mo ng el bimbo
nakakaindak, nakakaaliw
nakakatindig balahibo

pagkagaling sa esk'wela
ay didiretso na sa inyo
at buong maghapon ay
tinuturuan mo ako

(chorus)
magkahawak ang ating kamay
at walang kamalay-malay
na tinuruan mo ang puso ko
na umibig ng tunay

nanigas ang aking katawan
pag-umikot na ang plaka
patay sa kembot ng bewang mo
at ang pungay ng iyong mga mata

lumiliwanag ang buhay
habang tayo'y magkaakbay
at dahang dahan dumudulas
ang kamay ko sa makinis mong
braso

sana noon pa man ay sinabi na sa iyo
kahit
hindi na uso ay ito lang ang alam ko

(chorus)
la la...la la..la la la la la la...

lumipas ng maraming taon
di na tayo nagkita
balita ko'y may anak ka na
ngunit walang asawa

tagahugas ka raw ng pinggan
sa may ermita at 'sang gabi
nasagasaan sa isang madilim na eskinita

lahat ng pangarap ko'y bigla lang natunaw
sa panaginip na lang pala kita maisasayaw

(chorus 2x)

la la
la...la la...la la la la...



@@@@@

(Itong isang ito dito, gustong-gusto, may naaalala kase akong tao eh, palagi; it's how I feel.)


Ako'y Sa'yo At Ika'y Akin Lamang
By: Iaxe/First Circle

Ikaw na ang may sabi, na ako'y mahal mo rin
At sinabi mong ang pag-ibig mo'y di magbabago
Ngunit bakit sa tuwing ako'y lumalapit ika'y lumalayo?
Puso'y laging nasasaktan pag may kasama kang iba

'Di ba nila alam, tayo'y nagsumpaan?
Na ako'y sa 'yo at ika'y akin lamang

Kahit ano'ng mangyari, pag-ibig ko'y sa 'yo pa rin
Kahit ano pa ang sabihin nila'y ikaw pa rin
Ang mahal, maghihintay ako kahit kailan
Kahit na umabot pang ako'y nasa langit na

At kung di ka makita, makikiusap ka'y bathala
Na ika'y hanapin at sabihin ipaalala sa iyo
Ang nakalimutang sumpaan
Na ako'y sa 'yo at ika'y akin lamang

Umasa kang maghihintay ako kahit kailan
Kahit na umabot pang ako'y nasa langit na

At kung di ka makita, makikiusap ka'y bathala
Na ika'y hanapin at sabihin ipaalala sa iyo
Ang nakalimutang sumpaan
Na ako'y sa 'yo at ika'y akin lamang....







Sept 03, 2006

By MatchBox 20



All day staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something

Hold on
Feeling like I'm headed for a breakdown
And I don't know why

[Chorus]

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be...me

I'm talking to myself in public
Dodging glances on the train
And I know, I know they've all been talking about me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong with me
Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow I've lost my mind

[Chorus]

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

I've been talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they'll come to get me
Yeah, they're taking me away

[Chorus]

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

Yeah, how I used to be
How I used to be
Well, I'm just a little unwell
How I used to be
How I used to be
I'm just a little unwell

@@@@@


Sept 02, 2006

Every once in a while I'd wake feeling this way...depressed, that is. Sure, I can think of many reasons for me to be depressed...but what surprises me is that why I don't always feel depressed (that's a good thing) but hmm, it's weird, I know. But man, when I fall into depression, I tell you, I get into it all too deeply, it sucks....

I woke up pretty early today, but didn't feel like getting up right away. I just laid around all morning, and random thoughts just kept on gnawing--"What's the point (of living), really? Why am I still here? What am I going to do tomorrow when I'm still unhappy? What happens when it never comes? Etc.." Pretty morbid thoughts huh, I know. Certainly, I hate it when I feel this way; it's like everything na lang makes me sad today. Ahhh, there's not much I can do but to let it ride as I calm myself down and remind myself that everything is going to be all right (even though it's pretty hard to shake it).

Oh well, it's life. They say, pag may unos, may kapayapaan pagkatapos. Yeah, I think it's true, there's a silver lining for us din naman...so it's all good, I'll be OK. Sorry din dito sa kung sino man makabasa nito. As you know naman, blogging isn't all about happy thoughts. We all (or at least most of us) have intense feelings that sometimes need to be expressed; it helps us cope better with the predicament we're in. So salamat for letting me vent.



---@@@---

Songs of the day.


Next In Line by After Image

What has life to offer me
When I grow old
What's there to look forward to
beyond the biting cold
'Coz they say it's difficult
Yes, stereotypical
You gotta be conventional,
You can't be so radical

Chorus:

So I sing this song to all of my age
For these are the questions
We've got to face
For in this cycle that we call life
We are the ones who are next in line.

Repeat 1st stanza
Chorus

We are next in line..Oooh...Ohh..
We are next in line....

And we gotta work, we gotta feel,
let's open our eyes and do whatever it takes (2x)

Wooh..ooh..

Repeat Chorus
fade

~@@@~

TAO
Sampaguita

Tulad ng isang ibon
tao ay lumilipad
Pangarap ang tanging nais
na marating at matupad
Isip ay nalilito
pag nakakita ng bago
Lahat ng bagay sa mundo
ay isang malaking tukso
Bakit pa luluha
Bakit maghihirap
Ayaw mang mangyari
Ay di masasabi
Sasaktan mo lamang
Puso ay wag sugatan
Ito'y laro lamang
Sa mundong makasalanan
Tubig ay natutuyo
Bulaklak ay nalalanta
Araw ay lumilipas
sa gabi rin ang punta
Tulad ng isang ibon
Tao rin ay namamatay
Pangarap niyang tanging nais
makarating sa kabilang buhay

-xoxox-

(Para sa lahat ng kabarkada kong mahal. Sayang, kung malapit lang ako sa inyong lahat, whenever you need me, I'll be there sana talaga...but you know naman totoong I will help so long nasa kakayanan ko. So hope you like this song).

Tag-Ulan (with Chords) By After Image

Intro: D-A-G-(4X)

D A G
Minsan ika'y nag-iisa walang makasama
D A G
Di malaman sa'n tutungo
D A G
naghahanap nag-iisip kung sa'n babaling
Bm A G
Dito sa mundong mapaglaro

Filler: D-Dsus.D.D9.G-; (2x)

D A G
At tuwing ika'y nalulumbay di makakita
D A G
Nais mo ay may makasama
D A G
Sa `yong lungkot akala mo ika'y nag-iisa
D A G
Narito ako't kapiling ka
G A
Kung nais mo ika'y lumuha
G A G-A
Ako'y makikinig sa bawat salita

Chorus

D G
Kapag umuulan bumubuhos ang langit
D#/F G
Sa `yong mga mata
D G
Kapag mayroong unos ay aagos ang luha

D/F# G (Filler)
Ngunit di ka mag iisa kaibigan
D A G
Kay rami ng mga tanong sa `yong isipan
D A G
Nais mo lamang ay malaman
D A G
Bakit nagkaganoon ang nangyari sa `yong buhay
Bm A G
Tanong mo man sa `ki'y `di ko alam
G A
Handa akong maging tanggulan
G A G-A
Sa tuwing sasapit sa `yo ang tag_ulan oh

Repeat Chorus except last line

Bridge
A G
Ako'y naririto naghihintay lamang
A G
sa `yo tumawag ka't ako ay tatakbo sa piling mo
D-G- D
Kaibigan, kaibigan

Repeat Chorus

(Filler)
Kaibigan. (4x)



Posted By: Heart Speaks Online
Friday, September 01, 2006

Tribute to my Dear Bess.

The following is for one of my finest friends, Bess/Gerly (I miss you)

ghee



Bess, I'm so sorry, OK? Didn't mean to hurt you, I swear.

I know I worry too much, then subsequently finding out that the thing(s)...such as the problem I worried about that involved you was unwarranted. "It" never transpired at all; I know that now and I feel so stupid. But I do recognize when I make mistakes and I'm not at all embarrassed to apologize for them and am pretty quick to correct them when given the chance. I'm not one to let pride come between me and the people I love. For the unnecessary pain I've caused...and for the hurtful things I said--for sort of accusing you and all--I know I can't recant any of it, but I do sincerely apologize. And like I said, I'm more than willing to take all the blame, responsibility and the consequences therefrom.

But on a happier note, things had turned out unexpectedly better than I thought it would; the only thing I resent is that the fact that I couldn't spare you the grief that came along in the process. My being neurotic by nature doesn't help matters any, I know. I can be so quirky @ times that's for sure. Please excuse me for my dreadful flaws. But I know one thing for sure, I honestly do love you dear friend, and I care, so much (apparently, it's why I acted the way I did--I got jealous--I thought you traded me for Grace, so....) And yes, I, too, still want this friendship to continue on! Thanks for being so understanding and for weren't all ready to sever our friendship hastily like I was; it just shows, you're a much bigger person than I am...pasens'yosa ka talaga, kaya saludo ako sa'yo eh!

We've been through a lot, for many years. Through thick and thin...and I'll never forget the pact we've made. No distance can keep us from staying best of friends! And I want you to know, I'm in this too deeply and all the way; you'll always be my Bess (one of my very few [selected] best friends) for life!

And girl, I'm so happy for you and Rey; finally, andito na prince charming mo, (para ngang 'yong sabi sa kanta ng Chicago na "like a knight in shining armor from a long time ago, he'll take you to his castle far away [far away nga, in deed!] hehe!) pero seriously, talaga I like him, mabait s'ya, nakilatis ko na s'ya. Hehe. So kaya, may God bless your union talaga! You two have my blessing (like kailangan? Hahaha). Take care of each other, OK? Muahhhhugggzzzz

(Ang sarap din mag gunita ng ating mga alala, babae ka, hehe , nakakatuwa. Ingat din lagi d'yan!)


On a sappy parallel note (I'm recuperating from stupidity. lol): Something happened that got me really upset, you see.... It's about my baby's daddy yet again. Well, I guess that's a given. But what came next surprised me. Me, a pretty mild-mannered individual, clenched my fist and drove it straight to the wall. It's so unbecoming and unladylike, I know. But I'm going through so much lately I'm afraid my demeanor is changing; getting quite aggressive and....*sigh*

The result: a bruised (swollen)/black-and-blue hand with a couple of tiny cuts on it. Sometimes I just can't take it anymore. I don't want to lose my sanity because that's all I have left, if I let this thing get the better of me, it'll probably land me in some asylum somewhere over this...this...crap! (Arghh!) All I can say is it's hard to deal with someone who doesn't want to end things amicably... (There's always someone who calls the shots, while the other is in misery and treated unjustly. I know it doesn't have to be that way, but right now it is, don't ask why.) I just don't understand why it has to be this hard though.... It's like when it rains, it really does pour. Except it's more like a storm right now.... Oh God, does it have to be, really? No wonder why there are no more sparks between us (mah baby's daddy and moi...)

I tell you, as soon as my fist felt the surface of that wall...I knew I messed up. But I had nowhere to direct my anger, I didn't want to hurt anyone else. But boy, what excruciating pain! There was nothing else I could do, so I just cried it all out, that seemed to have helped alleviate the heaviness of what I was feeling.

The lesson: Never punch anything unless it's soft like a pillow or if you're feeling extra vigorous, give it all your best shot towards a punching bag instead. Hell, you can even do the matrix with that thing, and it wouldn't hurt as much.

I just realized something, "I'm really stupid." lol.

(Dito ko na lang muna post at lagay mga [memorable] entries ko...para dito ko na lang sila balik-balikan, basahin [pag gusto ko] kesa sa kabila, medyo lie-low muna ako doon, ala lang, basta. Hehe.)

Posted By: Heart Speaks Online

In the designs of providence, there are no mere coincidences....--said so by our late, beloved Pope!

Now, I'm learning the reasons for the many "I don't know whys" in my life.

Instances of that are the confusions of why I say and do the things I say and do...and the outcomes of such behavior/s--written in the stars--predestined, as they say. But I still think (in case we're wrong to assume that; though it seems double stardard), it wouldn't hurt to use some common sense on things, to help make certain things better...because it may be predestined and all, but it's still "us" who live or have to live in (with) it--we are the ones who experience (the un/pleasant) things and/or the ones who will have to face the changes of the consequences--it's us held accountable and responsible for our own actions, ergo, we (must) try to live accordingly.

May God bless us all!

@@@

Some excerpt from Better Days by Uncle Kracker (I normally don't like this type of music, but this one I sure can relate to....)

I been gone for weeks, I ain’t slept in days
I can’t find myself in this self made maze
It’s been so long since I’ve been fine
I’m just tryin’ to see the bottom of this bottle of wine

CHORUS

And I know I’ll see better days
Well I know you’ll see things my way

I never thought about change until
Spend a little time where time stood still
Been lookin’ for a mill but I keep comin’ up shy
I been a broke fool, I ain’t tryin’ to be that guy
Wanna ride like lightning, roll like thunder
I’m tryin’ to get some money, I ain’t getting any younger
At times I wonder, at times I won’t
Sometimes I give a f*ck but most times I don’t
…even care, through stained glass windows these eyes stare
I try to stay straight but it’s kickin’ my ass
Every time I look ahead I get a glimpse of the past
I sit half mass like a soldier’s flag
That’s why my left leg limps and my Dickies sag
It’s been so long since I’ve been fine
I’m just tryin’ to see the bottom of this bottle of wine

REPEAT CHORUS

Well I been all around this crooked land
I come across all walks, I shook Jim Beam’s hand
I got no plans and no place to go
It keeps getting harder to just say no
I see the people laugh and people cry
That’s how some live and that’s how some die
Well me myself I’m gonna sit right here
And I’m a watch this world break down in tears
All my fears and dark gray skies
Couldn’t crack my smile or break my stride
Got too much pride, I got too much shout
I might be down but I still ain’t out
Got too much time and that’s all I have
When I leave this world I’ll still be sad
It’s been so long since I’ve been fine
I’m just tryin’ to see the bottom of this bottle of wine

I knowwww, I'll see better days, yess, I know....

What big excerpt huh, halos buong kanta eh. Hehe. Sorry, it's a long blog na naman ulit, just venting out. Anywayz, muahhhugggzzz, TTYL! Ingats lagi!






August 25, 2006

thispromise He loves me, he loves me not.... He loves me!

It's nice out today, quite breezy for a change. It's been weeks since I came out of my little cocoon, I'm kinda like a hermit--figuratively speaking of course--a hermit who hardly ever comes out of her secluded cave, if at all. Hehe. So yeah, in the midst of this "turmoil" going-on in my life, I finally had the urge to come out and just have a quiet moment all by/to myself... I realized that, like "milk," it sure does (me) some good! Hehe...well, so it seems.

So I went for a walk about two hours or so ago, and when I got tired of that, I rested under this big tree situated right in front of my porch. As I lied down there, the birds were having a great time too as it seemed; and otherwhile, they'd chirp--intoned. It was really tranquil, and so receptive to some musing, I thought. So I welcomed it with grace; it's not so often I get this kind of warm invitation from nature, so I indulged in it, for a while....

As I sat there, listening to my mp3s (love songs that I have been saving for a while now), reflecting on the past, I thought it'd be cool if I could find a four-leaf clover to wish upon... but how inauspicious it turned out, I just couldn't find one; well of course not, where I live and all.... So I settled with a bundle of these diminutive stray flowers within my reach, and then, a funny thing occurred, it just totally took over me...and sort of like a magical moment, I could feel the momentum building....

"....He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me!" There I chanted, as his favorite song played on my portable mp3 player... "He loves me?" I repeated, in whisper, the latter to myself. "...and that was the last petal too!" I thought. Wow, that was so convincing! But knowing me, it wouldn't be enough, I just had to try again, and so I did! You know, just to be sure? Hehe. I tell you, I really felt so much like a teenager (it was all coming back to me, haha), and I liked it...no, let me rephrase that...I loved the feeling it gave me being out there alone and for once, actually having fun, well, sort of anyways...it's been a long time, y'know? I just miss being me. Actually, it's more like, I miss you and me; I soooo miss being with you...It's really no fun without you....

"He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me!" Yet again! Oh this time, I am not going to push my luck, I didn't want it to turn into something ominous. Oh, heavens, no! I wasn't about to take any chances, so quiting while I was ahead wasn't such a bad idea, after all.... That's the beauty of knowing when to stop; the choice is always ours! Hehe.

But where is this love story going? That's what I want to know...
Will fairy tales with happy endings ever assure me it can happen for real...to me...to us? I'm more than eager to believe...because baby, you're my only wish...palagi, sa buhay ko.

(I found this letter I wrote some time ago about someone very special to my heart, and I decided to post it here today, to update my page. Can't really think of anything better than to show or profess, here, the truth--the very profound feeling that still lives deep within me!!!--May God bring us closer, once more.... I want you to know, I really miss you, so much! You'll always be in here, deep in my heart.)

@@@

Some pictures of moi.

meanne
(Picture taken late last year [2005] by my little boy. Sorry if it's a bit blurry, the cam was going on us)

mommy
(|This picture is yet again, quite blurry; sorry. But I'd say it's still pretty good, considering it's a little boy who took it. Hehe. Taken early this year, around April of 2006)

(Updated 08/29 12:22 PM: Ang sarap mo kausap, namimiss ko.... kaylan kaya ulit tayo makakapag-usap? Hay.... Eto ako ngayon, naggugunita pa din ng mga nakaraan. hmm, corny ba? Hehe. Ah basta, bahala ka! , Sige ingats lagi ha, kung nasaan ka man.... Be blessed! TTYL! Muahhugggzzz! )

Taken by me a couple of months ago @ my front yard.
I just love taking pictures; obviously, Photography is a hobby of mine.
I added the caption too!

@@@



(This one's from lovingyou.com)

@@@



Anywho, for a different subject, here's a kind of funny (but true) quote of the day:

Dear Modern Music,
You are absolutely worthless.
Love, Bob Dylan

Posted By: Heart Speaks Online

August 23, 06

Trouble brewing--Impeachment Complaints filed against Pres. Arroyo.

But 7 out 8, however, were thrown out...so that leaves her with 1 to worry about....


Not long ago I posted an entry about President Macapagal-Arroyo; I just thought I'd repost it, and here it goes:

_______________________________________________

--February 2006--

"Democracy (from Greek [demokratia], [demos] the common people + [kratein] to rule + the suffix [ia], literally 'the common people rule') is a system where the population of a society controls the government. Democratic government also aspires to serve over 'the people' rather than ruling over them."

And my take on this?

I believe that one of the many good elements (simplest principles) about Democracy is when the government really listens; giving the citizens of its country the right/chance to speak and be heard. And that is what we call, constitutionally, true Freedom.

I think Pres. Arroyo should let the people, without any undue burden, celebrate and have their anniversary commemorations of the "People Power" that resulted to Marcos' relegation some 20 years ago. And although I see very little change in stability over economy and politics since then, it's still a democratic country....

Mournfully, the people of my beloved country can't help but feel and see Arroyo's administration is somewhat parallel of one running a totalitarian state by its own, believed to be, unwarranted actions.

But like every story, there's always two sides that should both be addressed, and must find solution to, in a civil manner.

Just so you know, I'm not being biased here my fellow bloggers. The fact is, I understand the President's woes and worries, and I honestly do sympathize. If her calls for "double red alert" is valid over this alleged coup attempt against her regime, and that her opponents are just manipulating the people and the situation that can put the government in peril...then who can blame her, really? That is very serious and unfortunate, that I think a lot of people can relate to. I just hope that this passes very quickly and peacefully. and I PRAY that this does not lead to Martial law. Now, that will be very unjust to everyone...and it'll definitely prove gravely unfavorable for her.

A fine line between love and hate.

If you ask me, I really wouldn't want to be in her shoes--in her position--your subjects and/or the community will either LOVE you (it may very well be only "artificial" or if not, sometimes, this is easily persuaded into antipathy,) or really HATE you to begin with, until the end. Specially after that cheating this last election that supposedly Mrs. President took part of, it completely made things worse. In fact, I'm more inclined to believe it (and the allegation about her husband and son's involvement in Jueteng [illegal gambling activity] a couple of years back) is (are) what made people (more) outraged...ergo prompted this whole new crisis.

I just think it's really sad for the country I love and so admire...seeing how unstable it is and for many many years now, that is. But still, I can't stop hoping and praying for a better change. Someday, I hope, things will be the way they should....

To all my friends, I'll be praying for peace and joy for all of us--Yes, you'll all be included in my prayers tonight!--God bless!!!
Posted By: Heart Speaks Online



Monday, August 21, 2006

Phobia Be Gone!!!

Yesterday, after a long 5 years of not stepping foot on the beach, I've finally gathered enough courage to go.... And there, I came face to face with the magnificent sight of the ocean I evaded for so long, attributed to my fear of the water. Once we got all settled in a spot, I sat peacefully on a blanket... then, I took a good look around, and I couldn't help but sigh a question of significance; "Just how, oh how could I ever deprive myself of such grandeur?--one of the variegated beauties that God gave us all for free--that's really beyond me!"

But today, I'm happy to say that I'm no longer afraid (well, at least not all that much anymore) that I even went for a swim! So kudos to me (yeah, congratulate me, hehe; I consider this one great feat of conquering fear/s....)!

Speaking of fear, sometimes, it makes me wonder, will I ever get over snakes? I am sooo dead scared of them. I have a feeling, this one's a losing fight. But I wouldn't mind watching the movie "Snakes On A Plane" though. I wonder if it'll be as good as with all the fuss about it. Hehe. But yeah, I can watch shows that featured them in it, I just can't stand seeing them up close and personal, that's the thing. But I don't think I'm alone in this, a lot of people are scared of snakes and spiders anyway, and so I guess it is, somewhat, no big deal.

I have a few more fears to talk about, but I'm not going to blog about 'em right now. I'll save 'em--that issue will be for a different entry.

So well, for now, I'll end this entry here. Until next time! Take care! TTYL! Ciao!

(A couple of pictures I took. Hope you like 'em. )





Posted By: Heart Speaks Online



Thursday, August 17, 2006

~Girls' Stuff~ Haha, pangbabae banat ko tonight! Hehe.

WOMEN, often than not, are almost always in the dark as to really knowing, precisely, what their real bra size is! Not all, but a high percentage of women anyway.

As a matter of fact, I, myself, went on for years not knowing exactly what the right size cup was for me...until recently, that is! All along, besides the sporadic distrust or uncentainty that instigated, I thought I was a size "C" cup. But lately, I begun feeling more and more uncomfortable as I age...and sure enough, after doing some needed research on the subject, it turned out "C" cup wasn't the right size for me. No wonder I always felt stifled....

You probably don't realize this, but wearing the wrong size bra will not only alter your boobies' own natural beauty, it can also give you bad posture, major discomfort and/or achy back (feeling) as well. And if you're really larger than you initially thought, it may even suffocate you to death wearing the wrong size bra! So, to avoid this unnecessary torture ("cruelty to your little babies"), start feeling more comfortable and boobilicious by visiting the site listed below.

http://www.limageplus.com/howtomeasure.html

So go ahead, enhance and enjoy wearing your bras!

Posted By: Heart Speaks Online

Sunday, August 13, 2006
Here's a new journal of mine... & for the 1st entry, here's Mga Nagbabagang Balita Jokes!!

...and I just wanted to say "welcome" to anyone who might stumble upon this webpage.

And haha, welcome din doon sa mga friends ko who might find out itong bagong page na ito...and mind you, I'm not hiding from you guys, it's just that I felt like making a new journal and start posting here--for a change of atmosphere lang kung baga--and if you come across this page, eh di bongga, diva, you solved the mystery!

And although wala pang nakakaalam ng page ko na ito, like I said, wini-welcome ko kayong lahat! Read all you want, ika nga.... At haha...it's like a game din eh noh, like kase hindi ko nga bubuking sarili ko na may bagong page--parang piece of a puzzle dating per se--once na makita 'yong piece or maka-crack 'yong code, eh di busted! Tanong, ano premyo pag nafind out? (Hehe) Well, I don't know pa...pero p'wede utang na lang muna? LOL!

Pero seriously, I'm sure you guys understand, kayo pa, lakas ko sa inyo din ano! Saka ala namang masamang may iba pang webpage eh, diba? Pag 'yong parang you feel bored doon sa isa, eh dito (sa kabila) ka naman mag post, oh diba? Hehe. There's just one thing, I haven't decided if I should or would ever welcome comments here.... For now I'd leave it this way, just posting lang muna. Sorry. Hehe.

Well, ciao for now. Read the jokes down below, hehe, I updated this entry eh, I added the jokes. Ala naman; nagpapatawa lang ng konti. Hehe. Enjoy! TTYL!
Posted By: Heart Speaks Online

Mga Nagbabagang Balita!!!
(Eto na po, Hahaha!!!)

Ano pa bang mas magandang daan upang umpisahan ang isang webpeyg kaysa sa mag paulan ng ilang biro. kaya't wala ng paligoy-ligoy pa (haha) ito ang ilang patawang nabasa't nadinig ko hir onlayn, kamakailan, hehe. Wala lang, natawa ako e, kaya I tot I wod sheyr it hir para sa kung sino mang mapasilip rito sa aking maliit na dampa sa ilalim ng "supot ng gagamba na kasinglaki ng mundo" (get it, as in www? Tama ba? Haha, ano ba 'yan, wat da pak nga ba mga pinagsasabi ko rito? Pati ako naguguluhan...nyahaha), mapatawa kahit konti, 'wag lang sana makornihan. Hehe. Di naman eh!

Ah, basta, kyut pa din naman magpatawa Pinoy e! Katuwa.

Pero isa pala munang babala! Mahaba ang entradang ito, kung kaya't kailangang magbigay ako ng isang "prosid wid kos'yon!" Ayan, nasabi ko na, hehe. kaya't sige, magbasa ka na.

Mga nagbabagang balita!!!

*Dalawang kalbo, nag-sabunutan!!!
* Capt. Hook dumaan sa Quiapo, pinirata!!!
* Palaisdaan, nasunog!!!
* Tahanang Walang Hagdan, inakyat!!!
* Bakla sumali sa away, napasubo!!!
* Bagong tuli nagyabang, lumaki ang ulo!!!
* Unanong *****, napagkamalang penguin!!!
* Bulag nakapatay, nagdilim daw ang paningin!!!
* Iceman nanood ng porno, nag-init!!!
* Tindera ng suka, tinoyo!!!
* Teacher nagkamali, tinuruan ng leksyon!!!
* Lolo naakusahang nang-rape, pero sa korte...biktima ayaw tumayo!!!
* Eroplano nag-crash, lahat ng pasahero namatay...sabi ng mga survivors!!!
* Basurero nagsampa ng kaso, ibinasura!!!
* Dahil may reklamo, eskwelahan ng mga bingi nag-noise barrage!!!
* Tubero, nagka-tulo!!!
* Lalaki natagpuang pugot ang ulo, inaalam pa kung buhay!!!
* Barbero tumestigo sa krimen, ayaw paniwalaan!!!
* Misis ng photographer, nakunan!!!
* Tindera ng tubig, namatay sa uhaw!!!
* Kaso ng pilay, nilalakad!!!
* Invisible man, nakita na!!!
* Bakla lumuhod sa simbahan, pinalabas!!!
* Labandera nagkamali, sinabon!!!
* Lalaki kumain ng boneless bangus, natinik!!!
* Janitor sumali sa basketball, nilampaso!!!
* Paco binaha, kinalawang!!!
* Dahil lagi raw tulog, guwardiya binantayan!!!
*Bangkay, natagpuang patay!!!
*Tindera ng mais, nagpatawa korni!!!
*Tindero ng plastik, supot!!!
Hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan ang mga mumunti ngunit ginintuang butil na payo na nakuha ko sa aking mga magulang:

1. Si Inay, tinuruan niya ako HOW TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE: "Kung kayong dalawa ay magpapatayan, doon kayo sa labas! Mga leche kayo, kalilinis ko lang ng bahay."

2. Natuto ako ng RELIGION kay Itay: "Kapag yang mantsa di natanggal sa carpet, magdasal ka na!"

3. Kay Inay ako natuto ng LOGIC: "Kaya ganyan, dahil sinabi ko."

4. At kay Inay pa rin ako natuto MORE LOGIC: "Kapag ikaw ay nalaglag diyan sa bubong,ako lang magisa ang manonood ng sine."

5. Si Inay din ang nagturo sa akin kung ano ang ibig sabihin ng IRONY: "Sige ngumalngal ka pa at bibigyan talaga kita ng iiyakan mo!"

6. Si Inay ang nagpaliwanag sa akin kung ano ang CONTORTIONISM: "Tingnan mo nga yang dumi sa likod ng leeg mo, tingnan mo!!!"

7. Si Itay ang nagpaliwanag sa akin kung anong ibig sabihin ng STAMINA: "Wag kang tatayo diyan hangga't di mo nauubos lahat ng pagkain mo!"

8. At si Inay ang nagturo sa amin kung ano ang WEATHER: "Lintek talaga kayo, ano ba itong kuwarto nyong magkapatid, parang dinaanan ng bagyo!"

9. Ganito ang paliwanag sa akin ni Inay tungkol sa CIRCLE OF LIFE: "Malandi kang bata ka, iniluwal kita sa mundong ito, maari rin kitang alisin sa mundong ito."

10. Kay Itay ako natuto kung ano ang BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION: "Tumigil ka nga diyan! Huwag kang mag-inarte na parang Nanay mo!"

11. Si Inay naman ang nagturo kung anong ibig sabihin ng GENETICS: "Nagmana ka ngang talaga sa ama mong walanghiya!"

12. Si Inay naman ang nagpaliwanag sa amin kung anong ibig sabihin ng ENVY: "Maraming mga batang ulila sa magulang,di ba kayo nagpapasalamat at mayroon kayong magulang na tulad namin?"

13. Si Itay naman ang nagturo sa akin ng ANTICIPATION: "Sige kang bata ka, hintayin mong makarating tayo sa bahay!"

14. At si Itay pa rin ang nagturo kay Kuya kung anong ibig sabihin ng RECEIVING: "Uupakan kita pagdating natin sa bahay!"

15. Si Inay naman ang nagturo sa akin kung ano ang HUMOR: "Kapag naputol yang mga paa mo ng pinaglalaruan mong lawnmower, wag na wag kang tatakbo sa akin at lulumpuhin kita!"

16. At ang pinakamahalaga sa lahat, natutunan ko kina Inay at Itay kung ano ang JUSTICE: "Isang araw magkakaroon ka rin ng anak, tiyak magiging katulad mo at magiging sakit din sa ulo!"
Learn Chinese in 10 Minutes

1) That's not right ......................... Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive?............. Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP................................ Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man ................................ Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse ............................... Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the beach? .................. Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table .............. Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift .............. Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here .................... Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet ............. Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone .................. No Pah King
12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week ... Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight ..................... Lei Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile ............. Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive .............. Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great .................................... Fa Kin Su Pah

TAGALOG JOKES Ambisyoso

EDSON: "Inay, kelan po ba tayo bibili ng bapor?"
SABEL: "Malapit na anak."
EDSON: "Kelan nga po?"
SABEL: "Pag may sarili na tayong dagat!"

Tatay na Mayabang: Ako'y tunay na natutuwa sa aking panganay na lalaki. Nagtapos ng Business Administration sa UP at mayroong MBA galing sa Harvard. Ngayon, e Presidente siya ng isang malaking Corporasyon. Sa yaman niya, e, binigyan niya ng isang Mercedes at isang BMW yung isang kaibigan niya.

Tatay na Mayabang Rin: Ako'y galak na galak sa bunso kong lalaki. Nagtapos ng Medicina sa UP-PGH at nag Residency sa Sloan Kettering. Ngayon, e Director for Research siya at kandidato para sa Nobel Prize. Mayaman din siya. Biro mo, yung isang kaibigan e binigyan niya ng apartment sa 5th Avenue sa Manhattan.

Tatay na Nahihiya: Ako'y medyo disappointed dito sa kaisaisa kong lalaki. Nangyari pa e bakla at binabae. Hindi bale nang malandi, e kung sino-sino pang lalaki ang mga kinkasama. Hairdresser siya pero mukha namang mahusay makisama. Yung kaniyang BMW at Mercedes, at yung tinitirhan niyang apartment sa 5th Avenue e bigay lahat ng mga "boypren" niya.

Batang Mayabang: Ang tatay ko, pag nagsigarilyo, napapalabas niya sa ilong ang usok!

Batang MasMayabang: Luma siya ng tatay ko. Ang tatay ko, pagnagsigarilyo, labas sa tainga ang usok!

Batang Pinakamayabang: Luma silang lahat ng tatay ko. Ang tatay ko, pagnagsigarilyo, labas sa puwit ang usok!

Batang Mayabang at Batang MasMayabang: Naka! Yabang mo naman! Paano mo naman nalaman?

Batang Pinakamayabang: Kaninang umaga, bago labhan ng nanay ko yung jockey niya, nakita ko may nicotine pa nga, eh!

A judicial clerk in a small and far-flung provincial court had to translate, from Tagalog to English, the following passage uttered by a witness:

"Pagkatapos ng kung ano-ano ay nagdatingan ang kung sino-sino!"

Confidently and simply, the clerk wrote: "After the what-what came the who-who!"

O corny ba? Di naman e, katuwa nga eh, kahit papaano, nakakasaya ng day at nakakabawas/alis ng boredom. OK na din sa olrayt! Hek hek.
So 'yon, hope na enjoy naman n'yo kahit paano... Basta, anything...just to crack a smile on your face. Uy, inglis 'yon ha! Ha ha ha. Speaking of English, here's a Chat/Internet Addict joke! hope you like it! :

You Know You're An Internet Addict When:
  • You spend more time on your girlfriend's home page than with your girlfriend.
  • You didn't know that Firefox was also a movie starring Clint Eastwood.
  • Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
  • There's a permanent ass-groove in your computer chair, but you haven't noticed.
  • You've said "no" to sex in order to view Internet porn.
  • You've rationalized installing a mini-fridge, microwave, and port-a-potty at your workstation.
  • You go shopping every week, but you've never been inside a mall.
  • You don't believe anything you read in a newspaper unless you verify it on a news site.
  • You think that 404 is the number of the beast.
  • You refuse to go outside because of the sun: "it burns! IT BURNS!!"
  • Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.
  • You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com
  • You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading. And you have an ethernet connection right next to the toilet paper.
  • You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue when it happened.
  • You crank up your surround-sound whenever leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.
  • All of your friends have an @ in their names.
  • When looking at a pageful of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.
  • You've already visited all the links at Yahoo and you're halfway through Lycos.
  • You can't call your mother...she doesn't have IRC, ICQ, or Instant Messaging.
  • You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
  • You have commandeered your teenager's phone line for a secondary net connection in case your ADSL goes down, and even his friends know not to call on his line anymore.
  • Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
  • You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
  • You don't know the sex of three of your closest friends, because they have gender-neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
  • You name your children Eudora, Mozilla and Dotcom.
  • Your husband tells you he's had the beard for 2 months.
  • You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
  • You tell the cab driver you live at http://123.elm.street/house/bluetrim.html
  • You actually try that 123.elm.street address.
  • You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to do" and you don't even have a job.
  • Your wife makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed.". So you file for a divorce...online.
  • You are so familiar with the WWW that you find the search engines useless.
  • You get a tattoo that says "This body best viewed with Internet Explorer 5.0 or higher."
  • You forget what year it is.
  • You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
  • You begin to wonder how on earth your service provider is allowed to call 200 hours per month "unlimited."
  • You turn on your computer and turn off your wife.
  • Your wife says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy another computer and add her to the network so the two of you can chat.
  • You refuse to go on vacation where there's no electricity, phone lines, or hotspots.
  • You finally do take that vacation, but only after buying a data-enabled cel-phone, and a wi-fi PDA.
  • You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.

(sa geekoftheday.com ko ito nakuhang jpg/pic at joke.)
Ha ha ha, meron joke na ganito dati, na tagalog naman, sabi ganito:

* Alam mong chat addict ka pag 'yong nakahiga ka at nagmumuni-muni, tinatype mo rin silang mga naiisip mo, sa isipan mo.
* Alam mong chat addict ka pag 'yong kahit saang lugar ka nandoon, basta pag may naalala ka, tumatawa-tawa ka. (napapagkamalan ka tuloy baliw).

Anyway, 'yan lang naaalala ko about that eh, pero madami pa talaga 'yon, nakakatuwa.
Eto naman ang isang joke na itinext sa akin ng aking kapatid na si "Pocholo," natawa ako sa stayl ni Lola d'yan! Hahaha, hanep talaga, gleng! (Hala, di pa rin tapos sa jokes eh noh? Haha, but hey, I gave you a note of caution at the beginning, ika nga read at your own peril, hanggang magdugo mata mo/n'yo kababasa!)

But here goes the last joke of the day:

Apo: Lola pupunta lang kami sa tipar!
Lola: Anu bang tipar ang pinagsasabi nyo?
Apo: Tipar is party.
Lola: Puro salitang kan2 ang alam nyo, mga pakinshet kyo!!
Hehe. Sige, next time na lang ulit! Kulit ko na eh. Ob'yos ba? Oo! Hehe!
Ta tah for now!
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